This weekend my daughter Lesley brought home a DVD set for her daughter Kaydence that is of a T.V. program she was raised on…… why was I so happy you ask? But before I get to the DVD allow me take a quick detour and visit the ultimate Parent Trap….. second guessing!
Recently I read a Facebook post by a great motivational singer named Deidrey Francois. She wrote “I have
been thinking that 75% of the time as a parent I am clueless. Another 5% I am totally screwing up and the other 20% I am SuperMOM and my 3 kids totally love me to bits. Wait a minute does that add up to 100% 75+5+20=100″ I replied “I think that makes you normal. Not that my expertise is as a mom lol. but as a parent the 75% you allude to is that we know we don’t know… it’s very complex…. never perfect….. and can always be better …. the 5% we screw up is our humanness and when we clearly know we’ve blown it… and the 20%…. well that’s why I had to comment… the … 20% using Prados Law 80/20 rule… gives you 80% of the results, so you’re in the A category… and by this note striving for A+ which means you’ll get there.”
I think all good parents end up questioning themselves a lot as their kids grow up. Where do you draw the line, when are we over doing it or under doing it, where do we draw the line between safety and common sense and paranoia and disempowering our kids with over bearing limitations? It is sometimes the ultimate in rear view mirror watching. When anything does go wrong the symphony of Second Guessing starts to play!
As we grow older and our children do to, we wrestle with taking credit when they do well and also giving credit to them when they do well too or wonder if its one or the other or a bit of both and of course the exact opposite when they don’t do well. As I look back on our parenting as our children were young I’m sure we like most parents were all over the map. However reflecting back on some of the issues I am pretty confident we did a few things just right. One of them was not only paying attention to the TV our kids watched… but taking the time to watch the programs with them, not just using the TV as a baby sitter.
So this weekend my daughter Lesley brought home Season 6 of 9 in a box set of Little House On The Prarie to enjoy with her daughter Kaydence. After about four hours of episodes we all watched together I was very pleased that my daughter kept our family tradition going. The Positive Imperative is all about … more of this (Positivity) and …. less of that (Neutral and Negativity). For our family it was More Little House on The Prarie and Less make that none of programs like Married With Children another landmark program but for all the wrong reasons. Though Michael Landon had his own challenges in life, he did not let any of them inhibit his vision for creating a landmark family program that now is entering its third generation of viewing. Each of the Episodes that Landon not only acted in but directed and executive produced contained one if not several positive values for both children and parents to digest. Of the Positive Imperative’s adopted 35 Values, and their six broad classifications of 1. Wisdom 2. Courage, 3. Love of Humanity, 4. Justice, 5. Temperance and 6. Transendance were all covered as were most of their sub-topics.
With just a few episodes large macro issues like the value of our seniors, the negative fallout of gossip and
even community empowerment and justice were all covered. Within those episodes all sorts of educational topics were covered from truth to white lies, from self confidence to courage as well as altruism and trust and other significant topics like gambling addictions, the road not travelled and always the themes of gratitude and the sacred value of human life are always the given in that small little Minnesota town that my children watched as they grew up, called Walnut Grove.
I raised my children with one credo… good things make good things and bad things make bad things. I never used the neutral variation… but it was covered in another favourite family movie…….. so Thank You Lesley Sinclair as that line from the Sound Of Music where Maria and the Captain finally declare their love in the Gazebo, is ringing in my ears…. “Nothing comes from nothing Nothing ever could So somewhere in my youth or parenthood I must have done something good.”
Thank you Michael Landon, your Legacy lives on.
PI Founder. Author of the forthcoming books; the Positive Imperative and the Positive Music Imperative, has a wide background in teaching, broadcasting, the music industry and business and most recently served as a founder and Executive Director of the American Chamber of Commerce in Canada (AmCham Canada). He has also dedicated more than 30 years of his life to volunteerism and not for profits including Big Brothers, Memorial Boys and Girls Clubs, Minor Leagues Sports and as a President and board member of several not-for-profit boards. Interests include family, biking, tennis, reading, music and PI/PMI of course.