People know what to do, they just don’t know why they’re not doing it! ~ Bob Proctor
That quote illuminates the 1,001 obstacles that get in the way between ourselves and our goals, happiness and positivity. We will address some of these obstacles from time to time as it’s a constant, and each and everyone “like a lack of planning” for your newly focused diet can trip us up.
What’s the biggest untied lace? Understanding how our mind actually works, and no this is not something you can take like a pill, read a book and you’re done…it’s a life long study, that continually will give you new paradigm shifts as you with the newly found knowledge you will reflect upon things you’ve done with a better understanding, but also anticipate.
But let’s cut to the chase and share with you 3 situations where your brain might rule you, and you might not rule your brain. The first I’m going to call “acceptance of pre-wired brain patters”. These are simply the ways your brain will work, many of which we have inherited from our homo-sapiens ancestors from thousands of years ago. My disclaimer of course is that I’m not a Psychologist and did not go to school to learn any of this… I’m like you a student who is learning, but my advantage may be to talk in simplistic terms so you better understand it.
Understanding the mind – 1 example
Watch this video, and you’ll get an understanding of the by-stander effect also covered on the TV series “What Would You Do”.
Now please try not to get judgmental it is NOT productive….. because that’s where everything falls down. But did you hear the term “Diffusion of Responsibility” the exact opposite of the 3rd tenet of the Positive Imperative which is the “Concentration of Responsibility”. It’s subjective and there are always 101 factors you cannot consider or are not aware of. Do however accept the fact that if 31 or 32 people may walk by and do nothing out of 33 or 97% of the population, that you can I under certain circumstances would be the ones to walk by, and yes we might also be the ones to stop and respond.
ACTION 1 The Point is… now that you’ve seen this video, you have a better understanding of what’s happening, and that lady who you could obviously see was stuck, could be us, and with this knowledge kicking in and all of a sudden we have that aha moment of why we are stuck, we are in a better position to over-ride this “instinct” or “:hardwired” behavior and respond. A word of caution… it will take practice… for you will see just HOW STRONG the urge to over-rule your conscious thoughts will be.
Your Brain and pain.
All of us are filled with subjective understandings of human behavior and or first acceptance needs to be… our ideas are likely faulty, and secondly… we don’t know, and one of the ideas that this post will give you is that up until now you didn’t know that you didn’t know. Simply said… if you don’t know it was possible to be the issue you could not possibly address it… once you know it’s the issue, you know you can address it bu you still don’t know how.
Point two is that Pain is real, but it could be physical and it could be mental, as in when people are mentally isolated from bullying, ridicule, or simply socially ostracized, when you continually leave somebody out. The next thing to understand is that this pain operates on parts of the brain that can over-ride your pre-frontal lobe,.. the thinking present of mind part of your brain. Wow…that’s huge people… when you don’t know that, you simply don’t know to watch out for it, anticipate and take evasive action.
Action 2 Respond…. when you or a friend is in either pain, you can-now compensate by understanding that their brain or yours is pre-occupied….think of it as you get into a service station on a long road trip and you just have to go pee….BADLY… you really can’t hold any thoughts except……where’s the washroom and how fast can I get there… under these circumstances, if somebody tried to stop you for a quick survey, you might just take the clip board and band it over their head…. but more likely you would be curt and which could be taken as rude or not being polite… but you are really just trying to avoid pissing in your pants. Pain acts the same way. If it’s a 3 -6 on ten… is like a loud tv set distracting you.. if it 7 or 8. or 9… give it up… one things on the mind and its called pain and you will do just about anything your irrational mind tells you will stop it and it could range from suicide to a murder, if you think the person who is causing you the mental pain will stop if you do so….. Not it’s not rationale… and that’s the point to under stand it.
Coping in a multi-tasking world.
You can only hold 4 5 things in your mind at once, and as soon as you take on another one falls off. ~ “Your Brain At Work” ~ David Rock
Your pre-frontal lobe is like your desk top… of your computer or actual desk. It only has so much space / ram, and if it over-loads something is going to go wrong. On your computer, programs go slower, and are more likely to “hang hp” are freeze. On your physical desk, you are more apt to not be able to find things and waste time looking. or worse knock your coffee over and sill it everywhere because your desk was too cluttered. “Ring a bell?”.
Your conscious mind is the same way. Ever had an engaging conversation on the phone (hands free of course) while driving home and then missed your exit. Once again if you’re thinking about that conference you’re planning or something else that’s engaging… your mind is bringing in and evaluating a lot of things, but 4 or 5 is the reasonable limit, and when you’re at 6… boom there goes your exit.
Action 3 Simply BE aware of what you’re holding on your brain’s desk top… and remove stuff or put them down when you have a complex decisions or be extra aware when you’re driving not to deal in critical issues or day dream, which can also take up your desk space.
There are 1,001 more applications I could use to illustrate, but the point is now you’re beginning to understand how complex the brain is.. but you should also understand that you know you don’t know in many cases. Welcome to life-long learning about the brain, a foundation of Positivity, because when you don’t Positive People to Negative or Neutral things! Bonus Action. There is a number of books on the brain and how it works and other web sites to learn in our Positivity Resource Center here! (Look under heading “Positive Mind).
Victor Sinclair is the founder of the Positive Imperative and the Positive Music Imperative, has a wide background in teaching, broadcasting, the music industry and business and currently has his own sales & marketing company. Victor also served as a founder and Executive Director of the American Chamber of Commerce in Canada (AmCham Canada).
He has also dedicated more than 30 years of his life to volunteerism and not for profits including Big Brothers, Memorial Boys and Girls Clubs, Minor Leagues Sports and as a President and board member of several not-for-profit boards, and his longest association has been with St. Leonard’s Society of Canada, London and Peel.